Money, at last.

I got my paycheck today; felt like it took years, but at least I didn't have to have my memory erased. Though sometimes I wish I could have had it erased. Being cashier can be fun, it is interesting to see what people are buying, interesting to see all the different kinds of shoppers. It’s like a human zoo. I’m basically a hermit so I don’t have a lot human contact so I forget how diverse the population can be. During my down time I enjoy organizing the customers into five different categories.

The first are the Tech-Nerds. They are mostly 17-30 though I have seem some older; they come into to buy only computer parts. Such as DVD/CD recorders, extra memory, sound and video cards, USB cables, surge protected power strips, etc. Tech-Nerds also like games, but not PS2 Xbox or Gamecube. PC ONLY! And usually online multiplier stuff like Doom or Halo. They are all guys, I have never seen a female one.

The second group I notice is the Oldies. They don’t like music or video games, the only thing they purchase are replacement ink cartridges for their printers. Usually one at a time, and they always bring the old used one with them because they can’t remember what brand they need. This category is the one my father belongs to, I wonder if he realizes that cartridge he carries around makes him look a few decades his senior. Every now and then you will see one of the grandmothers buy a DVD for their grandchildren “Gee, I hope this is the right one.”

Then there is the Family: super-stressed Mom frantically digging in her stupid purse for checks or credit cards, the son who tried to guy a video game on his own with all the quarters and George Washingtons he saved up then realizes he didn’t count on tax and needs the Dad, who is holding the younger daughter, cracking cornball jokes to help him out Son with the payment.

That brings us to my next category, the Media-Geeks. People that not only shop alone but definitely live alone too, they can be any where from 23 – 53 and can be male or female. The females are really ugly, bad teeth, bad hair, obese, and even if you don’t give a flying fuck about fashion like me, you can’t help but realize how poorly they’re dressed. The men just look like regular guys, fucking annoying though, they’re impatient, loud and obnoxious, and always want to pull out a bunch of coupons or store credit cards, they also like to check the newly issued ads for sales, complete the transaction then force me to void it and start over again with the price marked down. These people usually buy several DVDs or CDs for their collection to fill the void left in their hearts by a non-present significant other.

Last but not least, the Shitheads, men or women 12 – 23. The males generally a little older by a few years, the kind of guys the Shithead girls like to date because being with n older guy will make them cool just like all their friends. What do these guys like to buy? Car stuff. Especially speakers CD players. Mini DVD screens and of course “SUBS!”. Don’t bother offering them the product service plan, they wanna be cool and do it themselves, and if they fuck up, they can always start over if it’s in 30 days. Ah, the Shithead ladies. They always look hot, and you can go as slow as you want, assuming no Media-Geeks are behind them, because they’ve got nothing better to do. Even if it takes you an hour to process the transaction they’d have fun chatting or playing with that new camera-phone. They only buy maybe one or two CDs, the ones they have been waiting for like, months for it to come out; and oh my god it is gonna be sooo cool!

Which group do you belong to? Customers can be annoying as hell, but of course I love them all. They pay my salary! I went to the bank and deposited my check of $157.00. It was the first time I had used the drive-trough one and the sucky-tube-thing was fun. Unfortunately the woman did not give me any balloon, stickers or candy. I kept $37.00 in cash and went to the mall where I got a delicious but overpriced slice of pepperoni pizza from the Sabarro’s in the food court. Then as I was leaving the food court I saw Phillip and spoke with him for a while, he told me had also seen me in line at the bank. He was probably stuck me behind in the drive-thru, while I argued with the woman at the bank. Mmmm, there is a new place in the food court that serves hot dogs wrapped in soft salty pretzels and I think you can cover them with cheese or mustard. Fat. Yum. In the parking lot I saw someone attaching a spoiler to his cheap rusty old car while his girlfriend watched. Ah, only on Wannamakerr.

After that I went home and watched Casablanca, it’s easy to see why so many people think it is the best movie Hollywood has made. The characters and the stuff going on between them was interesting enough so that I didn’t fall asleep like I do during most dramas. The historical setting also made it interesting. For an old movie it is not too bad but definitely. DEFINATLEY OVERATED. I would give it 7 out of 10. A dull film? Yes. But a classic?. Make that a double-yes. It did seem to have an air of class that was new to me. It is as much a part of movie history as 2001: A Space Oddessy. You should buy both, so stop buy Best Buy sometime and see me. High Fidelity is also on sale for $9.99! After that I fell asleep on the couch around 11:50 when he was saying something about beans. THE END. [music plays}

"Here's looking at you, kid." - Humphrey Bogart