Blah blah blah
A day’s worth of random dialogue dialogue:
Me: Hey, no noise.
Dad: Yeah, I got the car fixed yesterday. I couldn’t tolerate that shit any longer *imitates horrible car noise*
Jason: ---------, I’m going to make a propane-powered car!
Gustave: *reading other Gustave’s shirt* Why WU?
Me: because small classes fit better.
Gustave: *laughs* Yeah that’s what they say on the commercial but that’s not why I’m going there. Why WU? Because I’m poor.
Mme W: soyez rapide en me donnant votre argent de voyage de classe parce que je suis pauvre et ne peux pas payer vous.
Randal: Where’s Mrs. Stevens?
Mr. Adams: She’s in the hospital recovering from stress
Guy-at-door: Man, she really is a psycho *turns and leaves*
Jon: Why did he just call you Fred?
Me: What?
Jon: when he walked by taking roll he said "okay Fred is here"
Me: Oh before class he said he recognized my name from the roster and I told him my name was Fred
Me: What’s this?
Fred: He had to make up a country in world
Me: Corolone located north of Hawaii, the freedom to get whacked is included in the constitution?
Jon: So is the freedom to whack-
Me :–off ?
Mr. Adams: Okay now everyone, please by very quiet so you can hear the announcements, they might say something important you want to hear.
Jon: I can’t believe she’s in the hospital from stress
Me: Yeah, I thought that only happened on TV but I guess you can really get sick from it. Wonder what the symptoms are; hypertension, heart failure…. burning blistering boils?
Jon: Gosh, I hope so.
Mr. Adams: I heard from her this morning and she said she was okay. She a very dedicated teacher, and I’m sure she’ll be back soon okay.
Jon: I know I was just kidding.
Me: I feel like I should send a card or something
Girl-next-to-me: there’s ne on the board if you want to sign it.
Me: *goes up and reads card, then walks back to his seat* That’s the worst get well card ever she’d be offended if I did sign it.
Jon: But it’s the only one, sometimes you have to take lemons and make lemonade.
Me: No I can just buy my own, and I use lemonade to make lemons.
Jon: What?
Me: I’ll use genetic engineering to cross lemons with sugar cane, and cacti. That way you have a lemon that taste like lemonade.
Jon: Why cactuses? It would probably have spines inside and kill you once you ate it.
Me: No, I could choose to leave the spines out; and I need cacti because they hold a lot of water. You can’t make lemonade without water.
Jon: Then use watermelons
Me: No because –
Jon: Enough! That’s the stupidest idea I’ve ever heard in my life.
Jon: Hey, want to start a mob with me? Instead of being Italian it will be African and Irish
Me: That sounds like a great plan.
Me: A laser disk, wow I haven’t seen one of these in years. Look how big it is, I’m glad they don’t use these anymore what if you had your movie collection on it? Do you know how much space that would take up?
Guy-next-to-me: yeah but it probably holds a lot more data then a DVD.
Mrs. G: Please don’t touch the laser disk, if it gets scratched or dirty we have no way to repair or replace it.
Meg: Yeah, they’re big expensive and…really-really out of date. I remember in 6th grade they thought those would be next big thing now it’s essentially a spare tire for your car.
Me: Or a Frisbee. Or a coaster for four.
Ryan: Walks past then stops and backs up that is a HUGE CD.
Guy-next-to-me: It’s and LD not a CD
Ryan: It’s a BACD, big-ass-c-d.
Me: *see the drinking fountain is filled up with a greenish-brown liquid frowns and looks disgusted*
Some-girl: what’s that smell?
Other-girl: It smells like poop.
Janitor: The fountain' s backed up somehow…if you see anyone getting ready to drink you might want to warn ‘em but I think it’s just this one *grins*
Me: *see Brendan bending over to drink on the second floor* N-o-o-o-o-o
Brendan: *sniffs and makes a face but since the water comes out clear drinks*
Me: Ugh
Mr. T: You’d have men that were so ashamed of not having jobs that they would get dressed and leave for work like normal but then they’d just go across town to feed pigeons or something. Of course they found out when the bank foreclosed the house and Sally and Felix ended up on the street. Another problem was everyone taking money out of the bank at once. If everyone did that, you might get turned down because they bank doesn’t keep all the money it has at once, it’s got the money invested in other things that will make more money.
Guy: But isn’t it FDIC insured?
MR. T: Not even the FDIC can cover all the money for some of the largest banks. Now if the Farmer’s Bank here in Soapdish Kansas needs they’re money insured I’m sure they can cover it but not for everyone who does business with Citibank or Bank of America.
Me: Why do they call it Playboy if it has nude girls?
Guy: because the boys play
Me: play with what?
Guy: grow up, we all have a little kid in us but that’s just stupid.
Kayla: I have a little kid inside me.
Kayla: I feel fat.
Me: you don’t look fat.
Kayla: Well I know I’m not, I’m pregnant, and I have a little creature in me.
Me: We all have a little creature in us.
Kayla: Oh really, what are you going to name it?
Me: E. Coli. After it’s grandfather
Kayla: Ewww
Lacey: Terrance is the most feminine guy I know, he probably wears his sister’s panties! *Laughs loudly*
Me: His sister is hot; I’d wear her panties.
Terrance: No I don’t.
Lacey: I used to be in love with him till I found out how gay he is; now I hate him!
Terrance: No, you don’t.
Lacey: Shut up, yes I do!
Me: She’s just hiding her true feelings.
Lacey: I live with his family now, did you know that?
Mr. T: I have an idea; lets stop class so we can talk about Terrance's shinny blue shorts.
I actually thought this would be easier than just telling you what happened and look how fucking long it is. Don’t expect to ever see this again. Oh, and if you're looking for a famous quote screw you. After a whole day's worth of this why would you want to hear more?
Me: Hey, no noise.
Dad: Yeah, I got the car fixed yesterday. I couldn’t tolerate that shit any longer *imitates horrible car noise*
Jason: ---------, I’m going to make a propane-powered car!
Gustave: *reading other Gustave’s shirt* Why WU?
Me: because small classes fit better.
Gustave: *laughs* Yeah that’s what they say on the commercial but that’s not why I’m going there. Why WU? Because I’m poor.
Mme W: soyez rapide en me donnant votre argent de voyage de classe parce que je suis pauvre et ne peux pas payer vous.
Randal: Where’s Mrs. Stevens?
Mr. Adams: She’s in the hospital recovering from stress
Guy-at-door: Man, she really is a psycho *turns and leaves*
Jon: Why did he just call you Fred?
Me: What?
Jon: when he walked by taking roll he said "okay Fred is here"
Me: Oh before class he said he recognized my name from the roster and I told him my name was Fred
Me: What’s this?
Fred: He had to make up a country in world
Me: Corolone located north of Hawaii, the freedom to get whacked is included in the constitution?
Jon: So is the freedom to whack-
Me :–off ?
Mr. Adams: Okay now everyone, please by very quiet so you can hear the announcements, they might say something important you want to hear.
Jon: I can’t believe she’s in the hospital from stress
Me: Yeah, I thought that only happened on TV but I guess you can really get sick from it. Wonder what the symptoms are; hypertension, heart failure…. burning blistering boils?
Jon: Gosh, I hope so.
Mr. Adams: I heard from her this morning and she said she was okay. She a very dedicated teacher, and I’m sure she’ll be back soon okay.
Jon: I know I was just kidding.
Me: I feel like I should send a card or something
Girl-next-to-me: there’s ne on the board if you want to sign it.
Me: *goes up and reads card, then walks back to his seat* That’s the worst get well card ever she’d be offended if I did sign it.
Jon: But it’s the only one, sometimes you have to take lemons and make lemonade.
Me: No I can just buy my own, and I use lemonade to make lemons.
Jon: What?
Me: I’ll use genetic engineering to cross lemons with sugar cane, and cacti. That way you have a lemon that taste like lemonade.
Jon: Why cactuses? It would probably have spines inside and kill you once you ate it.
Me: No, I could choose to leave the spines out; and I need cacti because they hold a lot of water. You can’t make lemonade without water.
Jon: Then use watermelons
Me: No because –
Jon: Enough! That’s the stupidest idea I’ve ever heard in my life.
Jon: Hey, want to start a mob with me? Instead of being Italian it will be African and Irish
Me: That sounds like a great plan.
Me: A laser disk, wow I haven’t seen one of these in years. Look how big it is, I’m glad they don’t use these anymore what if you had your movie collection on it? Do you know how much space that would take up?
Guy-next-to-me: yeah but it probably holds a lot more data then a DVD.
Mrs. G: Please don’t touch the laser disk, if it gets scratched or dirty we have no way to repair or replace it.
Meg: Yeah, they’re big expensive and…really-really out of date. I remember in 6th grade they thought those would be next big thing now it’s essentially a spare tire for your car.
Me: Or a Frisbee. Or a coaster for four.
Ryan: Walks past then stops and backs up that is a HUGE CD.
Guy-next-to-me: It’s and LD not a CD
Ryan: It’s a BACD, big-ass-c-d.
Me: *see the drinking fountain is filled up with a greenish-brown liquid frowns and looks disgusted*
Some-girl: what’s that smell?
Other-girl: It smells like poop.
Janitor: The fountain' s backed up somehow…if you see anyone getting ready to drink you might want to warn ‘em but I think it’s just this one *grins*
Me: *see Brendan bending over to drink on the second floor* N-o-o-o-o-o
Brendan: *sniffs and makes a face but since the water comes out clear drinks*
Me: Ugh
Mr. T: You’d have men that were so ashamed of not having jobs that they would get dressed and leave for work like normal but then they’d just go across town to feed pigeons or something. Of course they found out when the bank foreclosed the house and Sally and Felix ended up on the street. Another problem was everyone taking money out of the bank at once. If everyone did that, you might get turned down because they bank doesn’t keep all the money it has at once, it’s got the money invested in other things that will make more money.
Guy: But isn’t it FDIC insured?
MR. T: Not even the FDIC can cover all the money for some of the largest banks. Now if the Farmer’s Bank here in Soapdish Kansas needs they’re money insured I’m sure they can cover it but not for everyone who does business with Citibank or Bank of America.
Me: Why do they call it Playboy if it has nude girls?
Guy: because the boys play
Me: play with what?
Guy: grow up, we all have a little kid in us but that’s just stupid.
Kayla: I have a little kid inside me.
Kayla: I feel fat.
Me: you don’t look fat.
Kayla: Well I know I’m not, I’m pregnant, and I have a little creature in me.
Me: We all have a little creature in us.
Kayla: Oh really, what are you going to name it?
Me: E. Coli. After it’s grandfather
Kayla: Ewww
Lacey: Terrance is the most feminine guy I know, he probably wears his sister’s panties! *Laughs loudly*
Me: His sister is hot; I’d wear her panties.
Terrance: No I don’t.
Lacey: I used to be in love with him till I found out how gay he is; now I hate him!
Terrance: No, you don’t.
Lacey: Shut up, yes I do!
Me: She’s just hiding her true feelings.
Lacey: I live with his family now, did you know that?
Mr. T: I have an idea; lets stop class so we can talk about Terrance's shinny blue shorts.
I actually thought this would be easier than just telling you what happened and look how fucking long it is. Don’t expect to ever see this again. Oh, and if you're looking for a famous quote screw you. After a whole day's worth of this why would you want to hear more?
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